Writing Workshot Entry

Chris looked at the ceiling above him.

His breathing remained labored and steady thanks to the machine that that pumped oxygen into his weakened lungs. There was the beep, beep, beep of the EKG machine that kept steady time of his heartbeat….

 

…Which was in rhythm to the count of the dots in the tiles above.

Beep. One.

Beep. Two.

Beep. Three.

“Still keeping that OCD in check I see.” Chris heard a voice say to him.

He turned his weakened body to see the image of a youthful form starting back at him. This was a youthful form that looked familiar to him.

“Yes it s me.” The person said to him, seemingly reading his thoughts. “Or should I say it’s you.”

“Am I—“

The person interrupted him. “Dead. No not yet but it won’t be long now.”

Chris saw the person smile at him. He strained against his weakened muscles and spoke once again. “How is this happening?”

“C’mon, the man that has written several books and short stories in his career shouldn’t question what is real and what is not.” The ‘person’ smiled at him. “But I forgive you because I know that in your state at 110 that you would tend to forget a bit.”

Chris tried to reach out to his former self but could only barely reach his arm off the bed. His younger self grabbed his hand and stroke him lovingly.

Chris spoke again. “There’s so much I want to know.”

The younger Chris seemed to be unfazed by the statement and seemingly answered most of the older Chris’ concerns. “Yes there is a God, Yes there is a heaven, Yes you’ll meet your love ones on the other side.”

“Okay you don’t have to be a smart ass.”

“Whatever,” Chris the young said. “You would have done the same when you were my age.” He paused slightly and used his free had to wipe the sweat from the older Chris’ brow. “Now lets get down to brass tacks.”

“Which is?”

“I’m here to tell you that you did good.” The younger one said. “The decisions that you made after 2008 helped make you the good man that you became.”

“But I made mistakes.”

“Yes and because of those mistakes you learned and grew as a person. Those mistakes made you the man that you became right now at this moment.” He said. “Your health is better, your career is better and your relationships with your children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and great great children are better.”

“I love them all.”

“Yes you do,” the younger Chris said. “All because you learned that failure does not mean that your life is over … that you have to try and fail at things before you can truly succeed at them overall.”

“Yes,” the older Chris said in agreement.

“You’ve been a good man … since you learned how to forgive yourself for just being human.” Young Chris told him. “Because you knew that being human was just part of the total experience that life is.”

“Thank you.” Older Chris said.

The younger version of Chris smiled back at him, while taking his hand and placing it over the older Chris’ eyes.

“Time to rest old man.” He said finally. “You’ve earned it.”

 

Nothing Going On Today … Except A Friend Stopped By

Hello … I just chilled out at home today. I had a male friend stopped by and we talked about sports and watched TV. However I did come up an idea for my new book.

There have been a lot of talk lately about love … black love specifically. I think I want to write about Black Love … because I don’t believe its dead. I really don’t and there are some good stories about meeting and falling in love with some that shouldn’t end bad.

Remember Poetic Justice, it was a simple story but in the end you were really rooting for the two main characters to get together. I want to write a story like that….

And I think I might have an idea. Of course it will be about boy meets girl … and there will be a happy ending. Now getting there … will be something.

More later

I’m In Love With A Stripper!

Sorry for not writing yesterday. Normally I put something down but I missed last night because I was visiting my second favorite place other than GameStop.

The strip club.

Ya’ll just don’t understand my love of naked women. There is something about seeing a woman in her birthday suit that you just can’t get walking down the street. I know that makes me seem wrong but I’m damn addicted to seeing the female form in all of its nudity. Add that to talking another woman along you are damned to have a good ass time.

Let me break down the Good, The Bad and The Damn Ugly:

The Good:

1. The women. It was a good mix of women there last night with a lot of shades. What I also noticed was there were a lot of women out there who had ass. Sorry I should say ASS. Got Damn I mean there were some stallions out there. Oh man I would be in a strip club every week if I could afford it.
2. The company. As I said before it’s always good to have a woman on your arm at the club. Gentlemen if you want to get yourself a show or some attention from the dancers, have a woman on your arm because you are going to get noticed. Sometimes the dancers are going to engage in some “girl talk” with your companion, other times they just want to put on a good show for your girl. Well sometimes it works (see The Bad). My companion for the night was
   espnchick1920. Now she told me that she loves the strip club but always finds that the clubs in DC treat their patrons like unics by surrounding the dancers with a no touch zone. (Again more on that later). Anyway espnchick1920 seemed to like the women working and the drinks that we were slinging down were pretty good as well. She’s cool peeps and its nice to take out some down time and not have to worry about the male/female dynamic. We were just two homies hanging out … well I won’t fuck my homies but that’s another story.
3. The music. Now I know its not right to say but there’s a reason that Soulja Boy gets air play on the radio. What they do is try out the songs at the strip club and which ever dancer gets the most play off the song during solos or lapdances usually gets spins on the radio station the next couple of weeks. (JD is famous for doing this). Anyway I love this type of music. It has no redeeming value and sounds good.

The Bad:

1. Getting your drink on. You need to have a low level tolerance in order to get your drink on. The club needs to make money so the best way to do so is to water down the popular drinks. That means Hennessy for 8 bucks a shot and patron for 25 (an actual cost when I went to Magic City). So I either have to come out of pocket or drink beer for the rest of the night. I picked beer. Good for a buzz but a little heavy on the waistline.
2. Dancers who take a hands-off approach to dancing. This is kinda a pet peeve of mine it didn’t happen to me per se but I noticed it with a number of dancers. Why bother to even dance in a club in Atlanta if you nearly have to stand across the room. Some strippers have taken a No Touch Zone to dancing. They’ll strip out of their costume, dance around with the music and play with their titties like they are dancing in front of their mirror while getting ready for bed. Like this chick: Look I don’t begrudge with the girls are doing (KP used to tell me horror stories when she had to work) but if you want me to spend money on you … you got to make me horny. Otherwise I’m going to have that look on my face like I’m studying you for a book report. (Now seemingly this rule is different for women becauseespnchick1920 was getting broke off like she was throwing money in the air) I tell you if I was a woman I would be a Lesbian Pimp!
3. Strippers who look bored. I found several of them in the early shift when we arrived and frankly it looked sad. I personally don’t think you should get involved in stripping unless you got the feel for the job. Like a porn star with a bad attitude it shows in the performances. You have to understand that you are in the customer service business and that means you have to get your smile on. (In the words ofespnchick1920, “Can you at least pretend you want me for 5 minutes?” – More on that quote later)

The Damn Ugly:

1. Christian Tramp Stamp: I’ve never seen these before and I ESPECIALLY never saw them on the back of a stripper in a strip club before. Doesn’t that touch all sorts of wrong?
2. The stripper that brought her girlfriend along: Look I know you love her and all that but it’s a little tough to get at least attached to you when your girlfriend is sitting in the corner giving you the stink eye whenever you give them a touch. (Which was commented by espnchick1920 earlier)

But overall I had a good time. (Well there was the stripper with the gnat-swollen titties and one with glasses that threw me for a loop but more on those later.

Oh there was a stripper that turned me out. I think it’s was because of my love for these earthy chicks but this stripper had me going. She was a light cocoa brown with dreads and fat ass. This woman put in work and danced in such a way that I got my first Strokers Hard On. Usually I’m a little hands-off and take in the stripper from distance … detached.

But when this chick put her head in my lap and her dreads just splashed across my jeans, I had visions of blowjobs dancing in my head. I swear if I ever end up going back there I’m asking for her directly.

Now if I can just remember her name.

*sigh*

More later.

Hello Again…..

Nothing is going on today. I did work at the office and worked out with my married friend. I’m liking the way I’m looking now (yes I know its been a week but I gave a lot of bad food so it works out).

Well I wish I had more to write about but I’m too tired to think right now.

More later.

Death Takes The Young

I’ve just gotten home from my workout when I had heard that Heath Ledger actor, one of the stars of the new Batman Movie was found dead in an apartment in New York.

No details have surfaced yet but people are whispering that it might be suicide.

Damn.

I can’t begin to think what might going through his mind. I’m far removed from my younger issues when I attempted to take my own life. That was a lifetime ago.

Death is never the answer for pain. I had some folks who were able to help me out of the darkness.

I wished that Heath could have found the same type of help.

Happy Martin Luther King Day Everyone!

Sorry I didn’t put this down on Friday, but today’s holiday reminded me of this exchange.

Co-worker: “So what are you going to do for the MLK Day Holiday?”
Me: “Oh I don’t know … maybe celebrate the fact that I can have an MLK Day Holiday.”

Cue awkward silence.

Now you can see why at times I don’t like my job … sometimes YT over there is clueless.

Anyway … here is the reason for the season. Happy MLK Day Everyone:

Black Love Ain’t Dead.

Here is today’s writing assignment from the writer’s workshop. The writer’s prompt was about Black Love Ain’t Dead:

 

He looked at her as she looked back at him with a face that looked like someone took her expression and put it in a blender.

She was a close friend of his since they started working together at the office. Always there conversations included times where she shared her hopes and dreams. Today was no different.

“James and I broke up today.”

The blood drained from his face. Out of all of her boyfriends he liked James the most.

“Why,” he asked her.

“Because he couldn’t keep it in his pants,” She told him.

“He cheated on you?” The answer was obvious but he needed to be sure.

“Well, I’m sure not talking about his bathroom skills.” She mumbled.

He saw as she bowed her head slightly and dotted her eyes with the tissue she was holding. It was obvious to him that she was hurting and knowing her as he did knew that she was about to break down.

The break room at the job was not a good place for that. Following a familiar timeline, he knew what was going to come next.

The snipping.

The hateful comments.

The fact that she was going to hate black men for all eternity … Well, until the next black man came along.

He had to cut that off at the pass.

He silently grabbed her hand and led her towards a path of privacy which included a trip down the elevator and a short walk to some benches.

The sun greeted them warmly.

“I should be back at my desk.” She said sternly. “I got things to do–”

“And half of them involve you sulking at your desk.”

“Why shouldn’t I sulk … I got a right too.”

He was calm not showing too much emotion. Knowing her as he did, he knew that he had to follow this route to bring her back to normal. “I know … but I wanted to say some thing first.”

“What?”

“I love you.”

She sighed. “I know you do.”

“No,” He said grabbing her arms and giving her a fierce stare. “I don’t think you understand.” He flashed a beautiful smile and attempted to draw her in closer. “Too many times I’ve been there for you as you dated man after man … none of them have been worthy of your time or even your intelligence and when its over you curse the fact that they were black or even men. However, I have been there for you because as a black woman you needed that strength that only a black man could give you.”

“What are you talking—“

He interrupted her as he placed a finger on her lips. “Let me finish … you’ve been with these men time and time again always barking about black men ain’t shit and how they wouldn’t know a good woman if one stand in front.” He gaze intensified. “Well I’m a black man and I’m telling you that I love you for being that good woman.”

“You’re my friend.” She told him. “You’re supposed to say that.”

“Well you’re supposed to listen.” He quickly shot back. “I’m not about to sit here and let you go down that dark path. “

“Dark path?”

“You know the one where you end up hating us forever.”

“I would never come to that.” She told him.

“And it won’t as long as I’m here.”

She looked at him and smiled. Her red eyes had brightened somewhat and seemingly the worst had passed. “So what do you suggest we do about this Mister ‘I-As-A-Black-Man-Loves-You?’”

“We put you back in the game.” He stated proudly. “We get you some men who are worthy of the queen that you are.”

“And how do you suggest that?”

He smiled confidently. “I have a few ideas.”

She smiled back at him. “You know I love you right.”

“I have no doubt you do.” He told her. “Not a single doubt.”

The two friends hugged in the sunlight. Strengthened by their love for each other and the fact that one of them proved to the other that Black love … black love in all forms wasn’t truly dead.

 

It’s Snowing!!!

It’s a Saturday and the snow has come. It looks really pretty outside and I’m feeling the need to cuddle with someone.

Well not really someone … the right one.

I’ve been feeling the need for the flesh of another one beside me. It’s been really tough.

More later.

The Weekend Is Here – Finally!

I’ve made it back home from working out. Tired as hell … I hope these workouts end up giving me some energy because I am feeling the fatigue.

It supposed to snow tonight so I might be snowed in for tomorrow.

More later.

Getting My Workout On … Damn I’m Tired!!

Just got back in from working out and I’m wore out. Tomorrow at work I got to do a write up for that Adult Website client and I’m not looking forward to that at all. This seems to be a clusterfuck waiting to happen because its one of two clients that are thinking about leaving because the software gets fucked up at time.

Sometimes I wonder why I even took this job. Don’t get me wrong I like the money, I like the health care but sometimes I feel so unfulfilled.

I can’t wait until the end of this week.

More later.